Cassy Fiano

Hi everyone! My name is Cassy Fiano. I was born in Jacksonville, Florida. My husband and I met when we were twelve, at a birthday party where he fell on the pool deck and broke one of his front teeth. I worked in several different fields until I got married. My husband and I knew that we wanted to have a family and that when we did, I would be a stay-at-home mommy. Last July, we found out I was pregnant, and on the day of my first doctor’s appointment, he deployed to Afghanistan. Unfortunately, during my pregnancy, I ended up with preeclampsia. Luckily, my husband returned the morning of my scheduled induction, so the day he came home from Afghanistan was the day we went to the hospital. 16 hours and a c-section later, we had our beautiful little boy, Benjamin. Being a parent has changed my life. I’ve learned to be more patient; that it’s possible to operate on two hours of sleep, and I’ve also learned that I never really knew what stress was until I experienced a baby crying inconsolably for four hours straight. I’ve learned that looking at my son sleeping in my arms can move me to tears, that I never really loved anyone the way I love my him, and that all of the hard times can be completely wiped away with one little smile. The last four months have been an incredible journey, and I can’t wait to share the rest of it with you!

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Mommy’s Been Replaced!

December 31st, 2011 Cassy Fiano

Ever since Ben was born, he was a total momma’s boy. He has always been, for the most part, attached to my hip. He loves his dad, but if it ever was between Daddy and Mommy, Mommy always won. I was the number one person in Ben’s life, hands down, no contest.

When Matt came home from training, it understandably took Ben a day or two to adjust to having his dad around again. But after that period of adjustment? Suddenly, Mommy no longer mattered.

If I left the room, Ben could care less. If Matt left the room, however, Ben would start bawling — even if I was there with him! If I was holding Ben and Matt walked away, the floodgates would open. If he saw Matt, he would reach for him and cry, wanting Matt to take him away from me. I couldn’t believe it! How was it that I, the center of Ben’s life, had suddenly become irrelevant?

In all seriousness, I have a lot of mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I really want Ben and Matt to be able to have as much time bonding as possible, since Matt will be deploying again soon. But on the other hand, how will it affect Ben when the person he’s become so close to is suddenly gone? That worries me a lot. Will it upset him, when he realizes that his dad is gone? The two of them have become two peas in a pod, with Ben and Matt doing just about everything together, while I’ve been able to just lounge around, baby-free most days (which is wonderful!!). And Ben is just going to wake up one day without Daddy there to do everything with anymore. How will he deal with that?

For now, I’ll just go on playing second fiddle while Matt and Ben have their fun together. God knows they deserve it. I just hope Ben’s able to adjust back to being with Mommy again after Matt leaves.

Any one have similar experiences? How did you handle it?

6 Comments on “Mommy’s Been Replaced!”

wpdunn71901 December 31st, 2011 6:18 pm
mommagirl, you are learning the toddler rules first hand, they are very malleable at this age. My youngest brother and I were as close as can be but i knew as soon as my mom showed up, i was forgotten (LOL)
Cassy January 1st, 2012 1:29 pm
It’s just a huge adjustment to make. Never before in his entire life has he ever really preferred anyone over me LOL.
wpdunn71901 January 1st, 2012 6:57 pm
wait till they start playing you against the middle its going to be fun

i look forward to see you and your family

btw addie makes a wonderful girl’s name
Cassy Fiano January 2nd, 2012 7:27 am

I’ll keep it in mind, but we’re having a boy this time!
wpdunn71901 January 2nd, 2012 8:45 am
hunny didnt you say you still wanted a girl?

you gonna have your hands full with Ben and wyatt
Cassy Fiano January 2nd, 2012 8:58 am

I do! There will definitely be a baby number three, but not until 2013 at least LOL. And I’ve already got a few girls names picked out, one in particular that I’ve been in love with for over five years.