Depression… Such an Ugly Word (Part 2)
While talking with the pediatrician, I told her that I feel guilty for being sad all the time. I have a healthy baby, a great
marriage, etc. What do I have to be depressed about? She assured me that my feelings of guilt were caused by the depression, which I still don’t understand, but maybe I will soon.
Being that the first person I discussed my issues with was a pediatrician, she could not diagnose or treat my depression. Instead, she referred me to a psychiatrist and told me that I needed to talk about what is going on with someone as soon as possible.
A psychiatrist. Really? Am I going to lie on a couch and pour my heart out to a complete stranger? If it will help me to feel better and to take better care of Braylin, I guess so.
The pediatrician asked why I haven’t talked to anyone about this before, “I don’t want people to worry about me,” was my response.
Here is how I rationalized that statement.
My family is far away and has enough to worry about without me adding my problems to the pile. Ryan has a very stressful job and when he is away, I want him to know that I am taking care of myself and our daughter.
Besides, I’m going to snap out of this pretty soon anyway… mind over matter. To which she responded, “Maybe.” Sometimes women can “get over” this funk on their own, but it is much easier and much faster with help from professionals.
So, to the doctor I go… I will be sure to let everyone know how it goes.





































