Bad Guy Mom
With all the activities a week can bring, I look forward to going to church each Sunday for some personal spiritual enlightenment. I think it’s good for each person to find time to do things for themselves, especially busy mothers who often find themselves wrapped up in the lives of their children.
As much as I crave for Sunday to roll around, I also begin to freak out about it too! It goes without saying that with each child we’ve added to our family, getting ready for and sitting in church with all of them has become one extreme ordeal.
As I sit with them in the chapel and listen to them argue about who gets to sit by mom or dad or the baby or who doesn’t want to sit by so and so, I grit my teeth in angst. It seems like I’m constantly throwing out threats, “If you don’t be quiet…”, “If you don’t stop that…” I try so hard to listen to what is being said and focus on more important things but then Isaak starts whining because I won’t let him walk around the chapel or August starts crying because he’s hungry.
I’m swatting little legs left and right trying to get kids to behave and be quiet. I feel like everyone in the room is wondering whose kids are making all that noise. I start digging through my diaper bag for something, ANYTHING to give to the kids to keep them quiet. My keys? Gum? A crumbled piece of tissue? A stale cracker? Finally, I throw a look of death at my Lover that says, “I have HAD ENOUGH!”. And as usual, one of us ends up having to leave the chapel with a baby or two while the other stays to wrestle with the rest. I’m sure from the spectator’s point of view, it’s quite the scene.
By the time it’s over, I find myself frazzled and faint. I wonder why I even TRY because I sure as heck can’t recall a single thing that was said by the speakers. All that hope for personal spiritual enlightenment seems to go out the window. I have to keep reminding myself that I’m fulfilling an example to my children right now, even if I’m not learning anything myself. As much as I dread having to fight with my kids each Sunday, I know that I’ll be thankful for the outcome in the future.
I’ve come to accept the fact that sometimes it’s hard to do what’s best for my children. Whether it be struggling with them at church to stay reverent, or following through with a punishment, no one likes to be the bad guy. It’s definitely difficult, but so worth it in the end, or so I’m told! *wink*
Right there with ya, I am too paranoid of germs to leave Isaac in the nursery at church, so I try to bring him in the service and every time he sleeps right up until the sermon, then gets loud so I have to leave! Arg, at least he behaves in Sunday school, and all the older ladies in my class pass him around (:
You are the only person that I know that can post a picture like that and still look gorgeous!! I get all stressed just thinking about Sunday morning! Loved this post about what IS important!! Thanks!
Great…so I know I feel like a HORRIBLE mom! Those are ALL the excuses I use for NOT going. Thanks for being a better person that I am. Why are we friends again? Maybe I can just send my chickens with you next Sunday….it sounds like you have it all under control!